as my 29th birthday approaches, i can't help but reflect on the past year and what i have done to move forward. i finally moved out into my own place--that's good. but, i still have a slight panic forming inside my brain and in the pit of my stomach that is a not-so-friendly reminder that i need to figure out what i'm doing with my life in regards to settling down.
as i drove my car to whatever errand i ran this morning, i zoned out and started to have a conversation with myself in my head. it went something like this:
"i know that i should probably try to pick up the pace with finding a husband so that i can be married for a little while so that a few years down the road i can have kids, but what if that's not what i'm meant to do? what if i've been putting all my focus on the wrong thing? maybe this is the time to really think more seriously about my art. maybe i should be focusing on being a serious artist instead of just doing it on the side. maybe that's what i should do."
as i completed the last sentence in my head, a car that was driving along side me in the next lane slowed down and i noticed a little girl in the backseat window. she had a darling face framed with braided pigtails. she looked me in the eye and waved a delicate little hand. i hesitated for a moment because i was completely taken off guard and then i finally smiled and waved back.
um...was that a sign?